Britney is Reportedly Paranoid and Delusional

Sources have talked about a Death List found in Britney's possession when she was searched for drugs at Promises.

Britney is said to be prone to panic attacks. She is supposedly worried that her thoughts are being recorded by devices planted in her room. Is it possible that there are problems that are beyond the scope of the Promises program?

I cannot find out if they even have a psychiatrist on staff.

Kevin Federline Brings the Kids to Rehab

Britney Spears appears to be committed to her own recovery at this point and she got to spend a few hours with her babies over the weekend. This is Kevin Federline's second visit to the facility. He came in without the kids for a couple of hours on Friday.

Britney's parents are very much involved at this point as well.

There have been lots of stories in the media leading up to Britney's entry into rehab of her pushing people away when they tried to help her. Is it possible that some decency and strength of character on Kevin's part was the catalyst that finally got Britney to stay in rehab? Will the media have to rethink the role in which they have cast him?

Source...

Telephone Game

Remember the telephone game from when you were a kid? Maybe you played it at camp, or at school. Someone is given a sentence to start the game with and with everyone sitting in a circle, the message is passed around verbally in the form of whispers in the ear of the next person. The message will inevitably change as it travels from person to person.

I don't know if it is still popular. These days I hear that people in noisy clubs will ask someone to dance and then imply that what they actually said was 'You look fat in those pants.' Kids can be so cruel.

Anyway, PayPerPost is announcing that they are going to make an announcement. Ain't they just crazy? They are encouraging bloggers to guess at what this announcement might be. I can only assume that some of the conjecture will be mistaken for fact. This will probably create internet drama. I think it may be possible that RockStartUp, the reality show being made around the PPP staff is being picked up by some type of broadcaster. There are fast changes happening right now with internet television, so it could be that. It could be a specialty cable station. It could be that Ted is going in for mandibular surgery so that he can be photographed with his mouth closed. Is this picture from the turn of the century the same Ted Murphy? It is so hard to be sure.

Promises is a Rehab

There is a lot of media attention on how posh the stay at Promises in Malibu is. It is worth pointing out that they were the first of what is now called Malibu style rehab. They follow a proven 12 step program, something that some upstart rehab in Malibu have abandoned. I can assume that they abandoned the effective process because it was too hard for their residents.

Time for a Laugh

I decided yesterday that I was going to stop making jokes at the expense of Britney Spears. I think her sad plight might have been the catalyst behind Craig Ferguson's decision to stop using tabloid news as fodder for his monologues as well.

I may fall off the not making fun of Britney wagon a few times before I really commit myself to being more considerate of her feelings, but I promise to try to try.

In the meantime, here is a non-Britney bit of funny from an off-beat sometimes darkly funny cartoonist. Gaspirtz has dozens of online comics at his website that are free to download. He has the banner with the smileys that say "Oh My God, No Way!!!' when your cursor accidentally goes over them as well. I love that ad. Especially when my speakers are turned up really loud because I had music playing. Anyway, check them out, I am hard to please and I thought 66% of them were funny.

A Flash from Britney's Past

Tucker Carlson interviewed Britney Spears in September of 2003. I found the transcript while trying to find out about the connections between Britney and Michael Jackson. I thought that research would be worthwhile. An individual that was alleged to have been sexually abused as a child by Michael spent a period of time working as Britney's choreographer. His name is Wade Robson, I believe he still denies that Michael ever acted inappropriately towards him.

There are some really interesting quotes in this interview when you put them in the context of Britney's present situation. It is not hard journalism. here are some excerpts:

SPEARS: Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision he makes and should just support that, you know, and be faithful in what happens.

SPEARS: I think I'm still clean living. That's -- I mean I don't go home and have orgies or anything like that. I'm still the same person I've always been.

Full transcript...

Nothing in This Hand...

Most of us practiced a magic trick at some point during our childhood. The key to most of our success back then was not slight of hand. It was not the power of suggestion. No the magic back then was having an indulgent and uncritical audience.

Once the pimples start showing up, that kind of magic doesn't cut it anymore.

Everyone who is not a cute little kid faces an audience that is trying very hard to figure out just how you are doing it.

Now with magic tricks exposed, you can find out just how they do some of the most astounding tricks.

Are you interested in The Missing Dollar? I would tell you about it, but it would cost you.

Britney Spears: Who's to Blame?

As Britney unravels, I am left wondering how someone under such scrutiny and with so many positive things in her life could end up in such a state.

I guess part of it comes down to two things. She pushed away people who were telling her she needed to make changes, grow up etc. and she paid people who would tell her whatever she wanted to hear to come along for the ride. I don't really know who these people are. I think they all share some responsibility for the present state of affairs. Another person who has to bear some responsibility is Britney Spears.

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A Drug Rehab Website

I like this website called CordBlood DrugRehab. They serve a valuable purpose by offering very detailed and current information about current drugs of choice and the drug culture. Responsible friends and parents can use the information to identify problems in addicts and abusers.

I remember when I was younger and still living with my parents. They had my best interests in mind when they talked to me about drugs, but to be honest, they were really behind the times. I am sure that they were completely unaware that LSD was being used in our community. They were shocked when I told later told them that I had been offered the drug a number of times.

Now I can only imagine that I am behind the times a bit as well. Take the topic of Sextasy for instance. before looking at this site, I had no idea that clubbers have started combining Ecstasy (MDMA) and Viagra (sildenafil citrate). That seems like a very stupid thing to do, there is a greatly increased risk of heart problems. But I can imagine the head space of somebody who might think it is a really good idea.

I think beyond parent/child relationships, we should all be aware and responsible and look out for each other when it comes to the dangers of recreational drugs.

I think this is the most important page on the site, it's about the warning signs of drug abuse.

Promises, Promises

Britney has left Promises Rehab. Maybe they just fixed her up really fast. Robert Downey Junior is an alumni of the place. They do great work.

Actually, in all seriousness, I would not be surprised if a longstanding program like theirs has a fairly early confrontation of some sort in order to determine what the motivations of a volunteer patient are. I don't think this part is one of those 'no wrong answer' things.

I have never been in a program like this, so I don't know what I am talking about. I had a few days of training from addiction counselors when I was an R.A. at a university. Britney reminds me of a lot of the hypothetical cases that we talked about.

Edit: 15 hours later she goes back in. I hope she pulls herself together. I honestly do.

A Few Words About Storage By Mail

One of the main scenes in the Dave Eggers novel You Shall Know Our Velocity involves one of the main characters receiving a severe beating at the hands of a stranger. The character was visiting the a self storage facility in a bad part of town.

This is fiction, but it does highlight the fact that physiacally handling your own storage needs is not a pleasant task. The businesses will almost always be built where space is cheapest. There will always be a reason why the space is cheap.

StorageByMail.com offers a service where they pick your stuff up at your door. The key way in which you can save money with them is that you pay based on the actual volume of what you are storing. With other business models, you are stuck paying for a full unit of space, in some places as much as 200 cubic feet.

When you want to get your stuff brought back to your residence, it can be accomplished quickly and easily online using your member account, each box has a specific mailing and storage label that you print off at home. This is basically bringing supply logistics down to the level of the individual. I think it is neat.

Nontoxic

Does The Government Know What Sites You Visit?

If you were to visit a site like PassYourDrugTest.com, do you think the government will find out about it? Maybe the government actually runs the site.

"All orders are shipped signature required, someone must be at the delivery address to personally sign for and accept the package."

They make you sign for it? Are you sure you want a slip of paper with your shaky hen scratch attesting to the fact that you are worried that you might fail a drug test? I have heard that drugs make people paranoid and I am just trying to help with that, ok?

drugs,britney

Britney News is Fast and Furious

Basically, I can't blog fast enough to keep up with the stuff that is going on with this girl. I'm going to write about the two things that I know I am behind on now, doing my best to cite my sources, but I can just imagine that there will be something else before I am finished.

Somebody just walked in my door and told me that there are reports that the reason behind the head shaving was that Kevin Federline was threatening to get a court order for a hair sample to be used in drug testing. Wow, to paraphrase Rick James...

Actually, if anybody actually bought Britney's hair, they should be aware that modern science can examine hair to determine the levels and even approximate dates of a person's exposure to all sorts of toxic substances. There have been post mortem examinations of the hair of various historical figures.

Oh, yeah the other news item I am behind on is that Britney is in a rehab program in LA, according to reports. I got this news via Perez Hilton, the man who never sleeps.

A Great Widget for Your Blog

With the Box.net widget, you get a flash player that will stream podcasts. You can use it to provide visitors to your site with music, photos, videos, and other types of files. Box.net provides you with unlimited bandwidth and and they host an ENTIRE GIG of files for free. I have already posted a link on a forum about the box.net widget. I want to see what kind of stuff my friends are going to stream with their widgets. I am going to try it out.

Expect a Message on Britney's Website Soon

I am predicting that there will be new text on the homepage of Britney's site. I am also predicting that it will only be there for a short time. It will be more than one word and it will not get to the heart of any of her real issues, it will instead deflect blame and make excuses. There will also be talk of change.

I think Britney needs to go on Dr. Phil.

dr. phil
britney
britney spears

A Minty Fresh Credit Card

The Mint credit card is shaped like every other credit card. Wait a second, it actually has the bottom corner rounded off so it looks like this:


Pretty neat, huh. They introduced the new shape a few years ago. It was the first change to the shape of credit cards in decades. But a new shape is only superficial. To compete in the credit card business, you have to have great offers, too.

Right now you can get a rate of 0% on credit transfers until December, making this an attractive credit card for debt transferal or purchasing. I just noticed it is not just transfers, you can get o% on purchases to December 1st as well. I would really look into this card if you are in the market for a credit card in the UK.

The Mint Gift Card was launched late last year. This prepaid credit card makes a great gift for those hard to shop for relatives. It is basically off-loading all the decision making to the receiver of the gift, an excellent idea if you ask me.

The Ultimate MySpace Comment

An adoring fan wrote this 653 word comment on Britney's MySpace page:

I am a HUGE Britney Spears fan, and I have been a fan since she debuted with Baby One More Time. She has always been my role model,hero, and the person that I have looked up to. Britney Spears has helped me grow into the person I am now. Even though I dont know her personally, and some may find it odd that I look up to her, but I care about her and I am so worried about her. She has done so much for me, I just hope she knows that she is such an amazing person, and I wish I could help her.
It cant be easy to be her, you have people constantly following you, predicting your every move, poking fun at you and judging every single misktake that you make. Everything is blown up. I am saddened when I see her crying or the look in her eyes in the pictures that all the magazines have as there covers. She has been hurt and I dont see that sparkle in her eyes anymore. Its so sad, it makes you want to cry. Just growing up watching Britney you know she is a naturally happy person and she seems to always be so perky, but now she seems so reserved. I think its so sad that the media and sometimes you think that even world really longs to see her that way.
I wish people could see that she is a person too. A person that has to deal with everyday situations like any other person. In my mind people should be a little more sensitive to someone that has to live in the public eye, because there is so much pressure in their lives, because everyone is watching.She just got done with a very public relationship, a relationship no one knew anything about they dont know how it started why it ended, no one knew anything, and it wasnt anyones place to say anything. Her divorce is so public, and her children, thats such a sad topic, she cant even have them to herself, and that is so sad.
I guess what I am getting at is some needs to help her, and someone needs to support her and be there for her! I am so tired of people going to US WEEKLY or something like that because they have some hot gossip about britney, its sad because how is she supposed to trust anyone in the future?? How will she be able to make new friends?? Or have a relationship with anyone?? I would be scared that once I confided in
someone new that they might try and sell my personal problems to make money! It should be illeagel for someone to use information that isnt coming directly from that person it is about, it should also be illeagel to follow people around all the time to take scadalous, cheap pictures on someone. I dont support those magazines.
Britney is amazing person and anyone that knows her will tell you that, and I just hope she knows that. I support her and her decisions.I just hope people will respect her and her families privacy.She needs times to rediscover herself as a person, and she needs to do what is best for her. People really need to back off in puching her for move so fast with a new album and tour, they need to respect that she will do it when she is good and ready to, and if she wants to do it.
I love the type of person I see Britney as, she is strong, and I hope no one breaks her down. I hope one day she will see this message, and she will know and understand that some people know she is a person and that they respect her as a person and not EXPECT her to just be some to entertain them.

Note: Not edited for spelling or grammar (I give her a B+ )

Now this is someone who is truly a fan. I can only assume that this is a copy and paste from the girl's blog. She should use it as an English essay as well, although a quick run through spell check would bump it up a grade.

It is interesting to note that there is no mention in this treatise about Britney going out clubbing all over the continent. And no mention of drinking at all.

RayBans are Awesome

Summer is just around the corner, really it is. Oh and even if it isn't, did you know that you are at even greater risk of UV damage to your eyes on a sunny winter day with snow on the ground? The harmful rays are reflected off the snow. I recommend that you have large lensed sunglasses for maximum protection. Luckily they are in style, too.

I was just checking out these RayBans at BestBuyEyeglasses.com, they have a wide selection and low prices. You can even get prescription sunglasses made to order.

I just read that RayBan began production of their famous sunglasses in 1937 for the US military. Cool.

Britney Spears Is Wealthy

Something that we all have to keep in mind when we express our feelings about Britney Spears and her difficulties is that she is rich. There are millions of people in this world with similar emotional problems and similar substance abuse problems that do not have the resources that Britney does.

In some ways her wealth is enabling her continued troubles. For instance she was probably jetting from city to city to in an effort to obscure her addictive behavior and avoid having little mini-interventions from people that had become familiar with her. And her ability to party almost every night and remain as a primary caregiver to two babies ( in name at least ) is not something that poor people can pull off.

If she makes up her mind to try and turn things around, her money is going to come in handy. It isn't very promising that she bailed out of what sounds like one of the best rehabs that money can buy already.

Best Online Source for Phones

Britney Spears uses cell phones for a lot of important communications. She uses hers for sending breakup text messages to husbands. She uses her cell phone to receive breakup messages from her hook-up pal / tabloid bean spillin' idiots. She should have used her phone to call her mom and ask about advice concerning her current styling decision.

If having a good deal on the best cell phones is important to you, check out Wirefly, the #1 online source for phones and plans. Not only do they have good deals, they have good deals from all the major providers. They also have online tools that help you pick the best plan for you based on where you live and what phone you want.

If I am telling people about a site like this, I first make sure of two things...are they selling good products and is their customer service trustworthy and efficient? With Wirefly, you have nothing to worry about. They carry the best and most popular phones and they are rated highly by a third party certification.

If you get this great Motorola RAZR a portion of what you pay for your plan will go towards fighting AIDS in Africa. It is one of the best phones available today.

Britney Begins A New Phase

The first problem that Britney Spears has decided to tackle is split ends. Baby steps, baby steps.


Get your own Box.net widget and share anywhere!

britney

Britney Spears Shaves Her Head

CNN is reporting that Britney Spears was spotted at a tattoo parlor with a shaved head. Police had to be called in to perform crowd control.

I was hoping for some drastic change in the way things were going with this woman.

I have a shaved head. It is very comfortable and very low maintenance.

There are pictures. Hers are on TMZ, mine are in MySpace.

Britney's Old Friend Speaks Out

That Other Blog has published a letter that Felicia Culotta wrote in response to an earlier post in the blog. She was Britney's assistant back in the Chaotic days, so you can find her image in various places including TOB. It is a long and saddening letter. the thing that I come away with and would like to highlight is that Britney is not special. She has the same physiology and psychology as the rest of us. She must obey the laws of physics, including gravity. Felicia is hoping that when Britney hits rock bottom she will walk away from it into the next chapter of her life and be successful.

An Awesome Affiliate Program

If you are looking to earn extra income using the Internet, an affiliate program is a very viable option. Once you create a good site and use some strategies to bring traffic to it, you can potentially have some long term, passive income.

On average, users are replacing their cell phones every 24 to 48 months. The mobile phone service market is expected to reach $110 billion and reach 200 million consumers soon, according industry research.

The Wirefly/InPhonic affiliate program makes it easy for you to offer free cell phones with new service plans. They provide you with all the tools you need to earn commissions from sales that you refer to Wirefly. You can make use of their text ads and images of some of the best-selling phones out there.

More Failed Attempts At Indepth Blogging

I was doing some research for another blog about what things international performing artists have to consider when deciding whether to hold a concert in Israel. I am trying to find any information I can about any Britney Spears concerts in that country.

I found this Amazon.com page for The Ultimate Britney Spears List. Not very informative. I also found out that she smokes Marlboros. Maybe in addition to being a man she might also be a gay cowboy.

Review my Post and Get Paid

I have been taking part in the blog marketing of PayPerPost since late last year. I have to honestly say that it has made me a better blogger. It is a cliche but I am going to write it down anyway, A WRITER WRITES.

Before I was involved with PayPerPost an interesting bit of news or gossip had to basically walk up and bite me before I would feel like writing. Now I have started blogging everyday and researching. Heck, I have made phone calls to real live people in an effort to step up my game.

Hopefully, all the blood sweat and tears that I pour into this blog will pay off in the form of a loyal fan base who keep reading even when I become a train wreck party animal who has lost touch with reality.

I am also thinking about placing these new Get Paid to Review My Post badges on all my ground breaking works of genius. I mean what could be better than getting paid to talk about what a great writer I am?

What I really like about this program is that it could allow me to earn money while blogging about the main topic of this blog. I think there are people who have established some strong opinions about the main topic of this blog. I try to remain unbiased. I recently did an entire post talking about how unbiased I am. It would have sounded more convincing coming from someone else.

A Grown Man in His Mom's Basement

Wow, this is quite the amazing story. There is this guy who used to have a website that was insisting that Britney Spears is a man...AND HE LIVES IN HIS MOM'S BASEMENT!!!

I was strangely enough not looking for this bombshell at all. I was trying to find out if she had ever performed in the country of Israel. I am going to read the story about the man who lives in his moms basement very carefully tonight and see if it reveals anything else that is startling.

Beautiful People in Swimsuits

I live near a beautiful beach. Local community standards prohibit topless sunbathing but occasionally a tourist will either be unaware of these conservative morals, or it is possible that they are just really hot. One thing I have noticed ( besides the other two things that I have noticed ) is that usually, if one woman has decided to place her desire for a more complete tan over any hangups she might have, others will soon follow. On a saturday in July, will either be 5-6 topless women or zero.

With the sunbathing season fast approaching, I jokingly brought up the idea of creating a decoy of some sort. A convincing replica of a topless woman might put the others more at ease. After some brief discussion at the lunch table it was decided that the best tactic was to just pretend to have the same conservative morals as everyone else and just enjoy the infrequent and random toplessness as it occurs.
The preceding anecdote doesn't have that much to do with the the upcoming Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue and exclusive cell phone wallpapers of the issue's models from SI Mobile. I was just trying to set the tone.

Sports Illustrated has a longstanding tradition of creating an edition each year which contains the most beautiful models in stunning locations, wearing really nice swimsuits. SI mobile is newer, you can get cell phone wallpapers from SI Mobile that come straight from the photo shoots featured in the magazine for $1.99. Models include Bar Refaeli, Heidi Klum, Marisa Miller, Ana Beatriz Barros, Maria Sharapova and Molly Sims.

Does Britney go to the Best Clubs?

A friend of Britney Spears mentioned that Britney went to Tenjune four times in the space of one week. Here is a review of the place:

Blah Blah Blah

Esquire from 10023 | Posted on 11/26/06
Overall Rating: 1 (Not Recommended)
If you like a very young, very B&T crowd then this is your place. Otherwise skip it. The bouncers haven't quite figured out how to run the door or for that matter move gracefully through the club without shoving folks left and right. Being elbowed by the girl with big hair and fake nails or the underaged guy with too much cologne and slicked back hair is one thing but being knocked off your heels by the bouncers is another. And by the way, the lead bouncer at the door, Alex couldn't even bring himself to give the place a 10 . . . he weighed in at 8.
Would you go back? No
Would you take a date? No
Would you go on business? No

Here is another review, both of these are submitted anonymously, either one or, for that matter, both of them could be dishonest.

LOVE THIS PLACE!!!

nycprincess16 from 10016 | Posted on 12/18/06
Overall Rating: 10 (Highly Recommended)

I love this ultra hot place! I came with all my girls both nights this weekend and it was super crazy! I had a table on the Dancefloor with my crew and the DJ killed it, he mixed it all up old and new. Beautiful people everywhere. There seemed to be another model or hot guy all over the place Even got a peek at some celebs ;) Def recommend this place!!!
Would you go back? Yes
Would you take a date? Yes
Would you go on business? Yes

The place gets a 4.4 average rating. I have read a few of these things that were written about places that I have actually visited. Is it possible that people who get turned away at the door end up going to an internet cafe and trashing the place while they are still mad and still drunk?

The doorman weighed in with a fairly honest sounding blurb.

I Will Keep Blogging About Britney Spears

I made a decision and I thought I would announce it today. I am going to blog about Britney Spears for the rest of my life. I am older than Britney, and the life expectancy is longer for women. I may have to find a successor at some point.

Handmade Poker Tables and Chairs

It took me about 30 seconds to think of a good reason for having high quality gaming chairs and poker tables. I'm sitting on a task chair at a work station. These things are designed to allow a person to perform a task continuously in relative comfort. I can bet that many people end up spending more time at a poker table than I do at this desk. Sometimes getting up means giving up in serious poker. You might find it hard to keep your game face on when your butt falls asleep.

So this is a review, I wrote the first paragraph without looking at the chairs. All I have to say is WOW, those are some nice chairs. You can go for oak luxury (my preference) or if you want to recreate a casino floor look, they have the standard casino chair as well.

How To Report Britney Spears' Behavior Without Bias

Here's what I get about bias, from an unbiased source:

Any tendency to favour a certain set of values naturally leads to an uneven dispensation of judgment.

I think that's what we have going on with the reporting about Britney Spears nighttime antics. I don't have any first or second hand knowledge of how events transpired, but I saw one reference to stripping and upon careful examination of the details I would have more accurately described it as changing clothes.

And as for the constant references to passing out, the way I see it is that wealthy, famous people don't have to worry about being able to drive or even walk at the end of an evening. Britney has people watching out for her personal safety, making sure she doesn't leave anything behind, keeping people who would take undue advantage of her at bay. She can stay at a club until she falls asleep and there is no consequence beyond bad press, and I guess her babies don't have a conscious mother until mid afternoon.

And as far as the insinuation about homosexual behavior, I reconciled myself to the sexual politics of girls dancing with each other when I was eleven.

Change Happens

When life throws changes at you, one of the many things you may have to take care of as a consequence is your mobile phone plan.Wirefly can help you find the most suitable plan for your lifestyle and budget. A big change I faced recently was moving so far away that my phone plan was no good to me anymore. It was a bummer, and I was stuck with paying out the rest of the contract. They say 'once bitten, twice shy' and for me that means I like to stick to pay as you go for now. But I really am settling in, and when I use up what I have for service, I might consider changing my plan yet again.

I am thinking that a family plan might be a good idea, but I need to do some research and try to anticipate what my families phone needs will be in the short term. Right now we have two pay as you go phones, one serves as a mobile number for home and work and the other is for errands and for the kids to take with them occasionally.

Wirefly represents pretty much all of the major service providers and they have built a lot of comparison tools into their site. They have a sidebar with the featured deals offered by these six companies:

* Alltel
* Cingular Wireless
* Nextel
* Sprint
* T-Mobile
* Verizon Wireless

You can also link to full pages of plans for each carrier. The pages are in table form and include ratings from a trusted third party, J.D. Power and Associates.

Wirefly also has a convenient wireless wizard tool to help you pick the ideal plan.

I had a habit last month of righting a blurb about whatever certification a site that I was reviewing might have. Wirefly has seven badges on their footer, I guess they really want people to know how trusted and professional they are. I like BizRate as a way to be sure that a business has good customer satisfaction.

Something to keep in mind is that some of these deals may be better than what you might be offered as a walk-in customer of one of these providers because at Wirefly the competition is right there beside them.

Justin Timberlake and Kevin Federline Hug

The exchange was brief and apparently unplanned. Justin Timberlake was a scheduled performer at the nightclub where the intimate event occured, maybe Kevin went to the club hoping for something like that. I think despite evidence to the contrary, (formerly known as his hip hop career) Kevin knows that he is always just one news cycle away from being not famous. He needs to actively court the media attention.

The two men might share a genuine concern and affection for Britney Spears. When it comes down to it, we really don't know these celebrities. I tend to judge people I don't know by the company that they keep. Kevin likes to have a posse of hangers-on. Justin has a varied and mostly respected group of friends.

Security Issues

Security for homes and businesses is an issue in pretty much every part of the country. I have had a building broken into myself on two different occasions. The time that it was a storage barn that was robbed, I felt insulted. The time that it was my home, I felt violated. I was only living there part time on my own because of a weird work schedule. I'm guessing that the intruders knew exactly what my work schedule was. Knowing how unlikely it was that I would retrieve any of the stolen goods, I didn't even report it. If my family had still been living there with me, I probably would have been a seething mass of rage for a few weeks and I would have done a bit of neighborhood canvassing just to provide the perpetrator with a bit of unease.

This Florida Security System Provider can help people avoid these kinds of situations with excellent systems and professional monitoring. I learned from my mistakes to take home security seriously. I feel good thinking that this post might in some way prevent somebody else from having to learn their lesson the same way.

Isaac Cohen Has a Big Mouth

The offers from tabloids to pay for a story straight from Isaac Cohen's mouth were probably pretty frequent even before he broke up with Britney Spears. Now that he reportedly dumped Britney he has opened up and I can only assume cashed in. And what he had to say are the things that you should just not say about an ex at any price. If there was any justice in the World, this guy would never get the chance to hook up with another woman for the rest of his life. Unfortunately he is now a d-list celebrity and can have his pick of dozens of desperate LA babes with low self esteem (which is reportedly something he doesn't like).

A Different Kind of Encyclopedia

The encyclopedia that I am talking about is an informative directory that is organized in an alphabetical way. Let's say for instance you were someone like Kevin Federline, you have lots of free time because most of your concerts got cancelled and nobody wants to fund a second album. You might want to look for some Golf Instruction. You could just go to this encyclopedia and look under G for golf. And you need some bling if you are going to be out on the links with Snoop (like he'd invite YOU). Remember that for bling, you have to look under J for jewelry (I know it's kinda complicated). If you get confused, just sing the alphabet song (to yourself PLEASE).

Maybe This is Britney's Next Boy

This guy is the author of Emopoetry. It is a lot like the poetry of Britney Spears except that rather than putting a stream of consciousness up on his front page for a few days to get press and then taking it down, this guy has his poetry printing into these things called books and they have stores that sell a variety of books. You should go ask for Emopoetry at a bookstore, if only for the reaction. Bookstore clerks are a emotional bunch of people, they may be keeping all the copies for themselves.

This guy, Jason Quinn actually took this picture of himself in the mirror, I flipped it so you could read his t-shirt. Hit him up Britney, he is vulnerable, and he has product on the shelves. he is even selling the t-Shirt.

All joking aside Jason is an enigma of sorts. I'm not sure if you can be a successful EMO boy and still be EMO.

What Kind of Man Does Britney Need?

Britney Spears has made some mistakes in the man department. Justin Timberlake may have had the most potential, but the recent drama around his breakup with Cameron Diaz casts some doubt on his character as well. I think it's time that she seriously considered older men.

There is a chance that her difficulties with maintaining relationships, even friendships may come down to not wanting to listen to good advice. Older men that have some power over her, like record execs and managers, can get her to talk the talk of straightening herself out but it's unclear if she is really walking the walk.

How I Became a Sandal Wearer

I grew up in Canada. I have been known do sing the line from the Merle Haggard song that ends with "...sandals won't be seen." I have spent the majority of my life as person who did not wear sandals. Well I have moved further south and I think Kenny Chesny's Flip Flop summer tour is outselling whatever Merle is up to.

I wore the same pair of sandals every day for about seven months last year. My toes feel like they are going to suffocate when I wear shoes these days. I love wearing sandals. Active Sandals has a good selection of reef sandals be sure to scroll down to see the sale price on the rugged Newport H2 sandals. In my two years of steady sandal testing, I found out that cheap sandals have cheap soles and they end up splitting apart. You can get many more miles of long walks on the beach with quality sandals.

Remember The Famous Kiss ?

Remember the famous kiss between Madonna and Britney? Meredith Vieira brought it up while interviewing Madonna and in another demonstration of how old school medis is trying to piggy-back on viral media she offered to let Madonna kiss her live on NBC. Madonna declined...cold and flu season, I guess...and we are still going to let her jump on and take her once around the room. Britney has a bit too much dysfunction going on right now to be going on a network news show, plus she is dealing with a smear campaign involving stories of lesbian orgies. I hate it when that happens.

Warning: video is 12 minutes long at boring.

Funny E-cards For Your Sweetie

Making each other laugh is one of the most important things that lovers do. Valentine's Day eCard by "The Chins" can help you with that task. Humor with a sexual undertone is also a good way to gauge the receptiveness of someone who isn't your lover...yet. This tactic must be used with caution. If you know someone a little bit, the best thing to do is think about what music they listen to and what TV shows they watch.

I know somebody who was very upset about the popularity of "My Humps."
No racy Valentine card for that person.

You can get a free trial to send these cards or pay $13.99 for a year. $13.99. One of the main benefits of a paid membership is that you can schedule eCards to arrive on birthdays or Valentine's Day or whenever. I like the idea of just going into the site and pre-arranging a whole year of birthday cards for everybody because I forget birthdays a lot.

Will Britney Re-examine Her Lifestyle?

In an effort to salvage her public image, Britney and her people have talked the talk about changing her ways. I couldn't help but wonder if the tragic death of Anna Nichole Smith at 39 might give Britney REAL pause for thought. Besides the party lifestyle, new motherhood is another thing that the two had in common. And short marriages, can't forget that.

Racy Costumes

Depending on where in the World you live, you may be wondering why I am talking about Adult Halloween Costumes in February. The reason, of course, is Carnival/Mardis Gras. I live in a place with a long Carnival tradition. You may be a bit surprised to know that many of the people who would consider wearing the costumes pictured on this post would be men. Ballerina outfits are especially popular. I witnessed a very interesting routine last Carnival in which several men in drag were ineptly operating a hot dog cart. There were some very big flames happening.

Britney Spears: Freedom Fighter

Well, not exactly, but I wonder if she would have gone to a Congressional Hearing to defend the right to wear low rider jeans? I think she would have.

Virginia State politicians tried to pass a law that would have made it illegal to have low pants with underwear showing above the waistline. The State Senate unanimously struck it down when it came to them.

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Valentines Day, When it REALLY Sucks to be ALONE

You know how Christmas makes those of us who are away from our families feel it more acutely? Well, Valentines Day makes a lonely heart feel just that much lonelier. I have some good news for all the lonely people...Free Online Dating has returned after years of depressing unfree misery.

I am a bit of a veteran of online dating. I am no longer single. I have only done a sort of functionality check on Just Say Hi. It is a genuinely free online dating site. If you are interested, I would suggest you just try it out. Have fun and for the everyone's sake, please be honest about who you are and what you want from a dating partner.

Did Isaac Cohen Dump Britney Spears?

There are reports that Britney was dumped over the phone. That is slightly classier than a text message. I'm going to write the text for tomorrow's denials in advance. Oh wait...Brandi Lord...his agent has reportedly confirmed the rumor.

Hear Belisi Online

“Belisi Music is my attempt to take the same qualities I look for in fashion – sophisticated, classic, beautiful – and take it to music.”

Peter Belisi

I think I must be some kind of carrier for a radio personality bug. Everyone I associate with in any meaningful way either has been, is, or will be a radio personality. I work every weekday with a guy who does a Sunday morning show. I literally would not believe that it was him when I first heard the show. Amplification and equalization can make you sound like a different person. I'm not sure if Belisi is going to speak on his online radio station. It may be that he has just selected a playlist, but I am going to tune in to Belisi Radio to find out.

Belisi is an online retailer of luxurious high-end silk ties, scarves and women’s handbags. The Belisi brand melds the luxury and prestige of Palm Beach, Florida with Italian beauty and sophistication.

"Don't Do As I Do..."

Newsweek assistant managing editor Kathleen Deveny had this to say recently

"Our kids are being bombarded by images of oversexed, underdressed celebrities who can't seem to step out of a car without displaying their well-waxed private parts to photographers"

Despite the concern over bad influences, teen pregnancy, drinking and drug use are all down, and there is no evidence that girls are having intercourse at a younger age, the Newsweek journalists reported.

Maybe Britney isn't a bad influence because she isn't relevant. Or Maybe she is a very bad influence on 25 year-olds...look at what happened to Paris, she was sweet and innocent before she hooked up with Britney...right?

How to Prevent Stretch Marks

As Britney knows, the best way to prevent stretch marks is with digital photo manipulation, but what about those times when you have to appear in person?

Stretch marks occur because skin it stretched beyond the limits of its natural elasticity. This commonly occurs during pregnancy. the best way to reduce the occurrence or severity of stretch marks is by keeping the skin ultra moist and elastic. this really does dramatically lower the chance of getting stretch marks. This is very intuitive. It is also quite feasible, as long as the inner and outer layers of the skin are kept very moist and elastic during the rapid growth phase.

One thing to keep in mind is that you should be very careful not to expose the fetus to chemical agents. Tummy Honey Butter includes natural ingredients such as Cocoa Butter, Shea Butter, Vitamins D and E, wheat germ oil, olive oil, avocado oil, jojoba oil, sesame oil, almond oil, and aloe vera. I think this stuff would definately help. Stretch marks aren't the end of the world but if the idea of them scares you, prevention is the best strategy.

I Just Joined the Britney Spears Mailing List

I feel special now. I wasn't asked to check or uncheck any boxes relating to receiving e-mails about products or services. I used an old hotmail account. I needed another reason to remember to check it.

Get Yourself Some Cheap Sunglasses

Are you good at selling stuff? Do you have an entrepreneurial spirit? If so, you might want to consider selling sunglasses. The link in this sentence will take you to a site that sells Wholesale Replica Sunglasses in bulk for entrepreneurs to resell for whatever amount of profit the market will bear. I can only assume that half of the people who read this will immediately think they are illegal in some way. They are not illegal to sell because they do not have any any brand names or logos on them. You have to abide by the regulations in your particular location of course. But as a licensed hawker, or someone renting flea market space, you could make a nice income. I am going to actually do the math as I write here...the wholesale cost per pair is about $1.33. Suggested selling price is $8.00. If you are at a flea market, you have to sell three pairs before you have your table paid for. After that as long as you are selling one pair per hour, it is much better than flipping burgers. My advice is to do a market study, even if that just means checking out the available points of sale in your area and seeing if there is room for you in the marketplace. Also, larger orders save you money, but find out what the sales potential is before you over invest in stock.

I am Abandoning My Pretend Real Journalism

I have decided, after looking at the Google News results for the query Britney Spears, that I don't want to be a journalist when I grow up. I am going back to the original plan of fireman/astronaut. To sum up what the real journalists have to say, Britney thinks the single life is awesome and she is desperate to have Kevin back. She is partying all the time and she is busily recording her upcoming album, that sucks and is going to be awesome. I'm glad that I am leaving it to the professionals.

A Place For Day Traders to Hang Out

Stockwire.com is a Penny Stock website that wants to become the My Space for investors. It is has a focus on the Micro Cap and Small Cap investor.

The site is very interactive and has a sort of community feel to it. Did someone at Stockwire coin the term Stockumentaries? If they did, that is pretty cool.

You canWatch video tutorials on how to invest in Penny Stocks. You can also check out the message board, all the stock profiles, and they have a blog (Everybody's gotta have a blog these days.)

Stockwire is a free service.

Stockwire is one of the biggest Penny Stock websites around. They are currently getting around 100 new members every day. I have some experience with membership sites, that is a good number.

Britney Spears Website Update

Viget Labs has a blog. They do not mention any of their work with musical clients there. It is all web 2.0 jargon and stuff BORING. They do have a page expressing how proud they are to be partnered with Britney Spears. They also built Shania Twain's site, which actually has a functioning front page. Hey she has a fragrance, too. I'm curious as to whose scent is better now.

Young And Restless: The Soap of a New Generation

Let me start this post off by saying that I think Soaps.com has a great name for their website and I wish them a long and prosperous life on the Internet. If I had to decide which Soap Opera had the best name, I would pick The Young and the Restless. Basically the name encapsulates what viewers are looking for as far as escapist entertainment goes. They want to empathize with young vital people who have a lot of stuff going on in their lives.

Soaps.com has it all covered for Y&R fans with daily updates, news cast pictures, screenshots of key events on the show and more.

There is a community waiting for you at the Y&R Message Board if you are a guy who can bring it to a forum you a sorely wanted on this message board. I clicked a thread at random and the ladies are missing what must be the only regular guy on the forum. They lost him to football.

Britney Spears' Seafood Pasta Recipe

If you miss the classic stay tuned message with the interposed pictures of Britney and a tiger, you can get it at Archive.org. There are also lots of old pages of actual content. You can find the famous stream of consciousness essay or even this Spears family recipe for seafood pasta. Mmmmmm.

The recipe was in a Cook Book that assembled celebrity recipes. All the profits from the book went towards fighting Cancer. Britney's aunt had just been diagnosed prior to the Spears offering their support. She recently died as a result of her cancer.

Payday Cash Advance Loans

I suspect that at some point in his future career of commercial self-parody, Kevin Federline is going to try and profit from his perceived cash flow problems.

Unfortunately for him, you have to have a real job to qualify for Payday Cash Advance Loans. "I may not be a fry-cook, but I play one on TV" doesn't cut it, you need to show some pay stubs. You can relieve some of the pressure of debt using a payday cash advance loan.

SecureLoanConsolidation.com is an informative site in the areas of debt consolidation and Cash Advance options.

Stay Tuned?...

I have to go look at the official Britney Spears site every day, just in case there is some cryptic message inside that little antique frame thingy. I don't think every Britney Fan should have to do that. I promise that I will announce it here when this spectacular new website goes live. I also promise to take some kind of html tutorial so I can actually make a picture frame around my announcements.

Show Us Your Faith

Matthew 5:15 says "Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick."

That's the language of the 1600's. A more up to date wording might be "If you've got it, flaunt it." The IT being a faith in an almighty Christian God in Heaven.

The Rock Gifts hasCustom Christian Gifts available online. You can have your own message placed on one of their products or choose from a wide selection of ready made messages. Jesus Loves You might be one of the most enduring catch phrases in history. You can get a tasteful four foot long banner that tells passersby that Jesus loves them.

The site has a customizing tool. I tried it, it is pretty easy. If you have problems just get help from the younger generation.

Will People Buy Kevin Federline's Self-Parody?

Can Kevin Federline do self-parody?

I thought the self-parody that Vanilla Ice did was pure brilliance. Then I realized that it wasn't him, it was Jim Carey. It was still pretty good, but it was too easy.

Parody is easier than self-parody because once you get people laughing with parody, you are a success. With self-parody once the people start laughing it gets harder. It takes a really tough person to do self-parody. People like Mr. T and the Hoff have what it takes. Vanilla Ice guested on a Worst Of Special on MTV an reportedly lost it and damaged the set. He could not handle being made fun of. The quote my teenage son, "Sucks to be you."

I hope you guys appreciate what I do, I am now song tagged with Ice Ice Baby. AHHHH!!!

Drug Rehab That Works

A lot of drug rehab programs target their advertising to the family and loved ones of addicts. They stress how great their facility is, how qualified their staff is etc.

For an addict that needs help, the most important thing about a rehab program is whether or not it is going to work. Stone Hawk has a 76% success rate. That might sound low to a non addict. It is not low.

The success stories coming out of this place are great, but it shocking to see how young people are when they start down the road of addiction. And it shocking to see what drugs they choose.

When I was a kid I had a lot of freedom. I could pretty much go where I wanted and see who I wanted. Back then, my parents probably knew I would try marijuana, and they certainly knew I would experiment with alcohol. It might shock them now to know that I had the opportunity to try LSD (I abstained).

I live in fear that somebody will offer crack to my children at some point in their childhood. I have done all that I can do to educate them and instill them with some sense, but I know that I won't be there when it is time for them to make that decision. And that person who wants my kid to take a dangerous drug, is going to be front and center.

Stone Hawk has chosen to use the NARCONON program because of its effectiveness. They have a very intensive detox process that involves saunas. Removing and cleaning the build-up of drug metabolites in the tissues of the human body is an important step in getting well.

The psychological part of the process involves learning a lot of coping skills that many non addicts mistakenly think are instincts. There are a lot of life skills that many addicts simply have not yet learned. It takes time and practise to master these.

I have no problem promoting any treatment alternative that has some chance of success, because not getting help is not an option worth considering.

This is a sponsored post.

Britney Spears Sees her Shadow this Groundhog Day

Britney's manager, Larry Rudolph, reports that Britney is aware that she is casting a shadow that closely resembles that of Bill Murray, and that she has plans to change that. Bill Murray was not available for comment. This post is satire, that means it is not entirely true. Can you guess which parts I made up? Be on the lookout for more satire on April 1st.

More Free Stuff

This is a sponsored post.

Using online coupons effectively can be a great way to economize. Basically you should include online purchasing using coupon promotions as one of your options when you are comparison shopping.

Look at this offer for example KMart deals on Jewelry for the next few days. This is a very limited time offer. CouponChief has coupons from dozens of big name stores. Think about using them to save money on children's clothes, computers, even food. They are an awesome resource. But just like the old paper coupons...you are only saving money if you use them for things you would buy even without the coupons. I think my mom must have drilled me about that, it just came out of me.

Just So You Know...

The Pet Shop Boys still make music and perform live.

The paparazzi have never, to my knowledge, published pictured of their stuff.

The Pet Shop Boys do not, to my knowledge, have children.

Axl Rose is a big fan of The Pet Shop Boys, no word about his opinion of Britney's work.

There isn't that much point to this post. I find these guys interesting because I very purposefully ignored them in their heyday.

Free is Free

This is a sponsored post.

Free iPod is in danger of becoming a meaningless term because of its overuse in lame marketing schemes. These guys, iPodSweepstakes.com, however are actually giving away an iPod every single day.

I mostly listen to music when I go on errands with the car. It's an old car and it has a cassette deck. I bought one of those silly gizmos that has a cassette shaped thing you stick in the deck and then a line with an 1/8 inch output jack comes out of it so you can listen to your disc player or even your iPod. I don't have an iPod, and my kid never has hers loaded with any music I like.

I might try to Get a Free iPod from iPodSweepstakes.com Now! or even earn one by taking a surveys or requesting free information.

Pet Shop Boys Britney Spears in the Same Title

I'm not sure how I got out of sync with the news cycle, but by the time I saw the stories about a collaboration between Britney Spears and the Pet Shop Boys, the denials were already in print as well. I guess I haven't been keeping close tabs on the 80's pop icons since they became irrelevant. I'm talking about the Pet Shop Boys, not Britney Spears, if Britney Spears was irrelevant would I have a blog about her?

The Boys, who recently did some cool stuff with Madonna officially deny any association with Britney on their official site.

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Pet Shop Boys